Change of heart

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In the fall of 2000, I found myself really needing a win somewhere: I was rather broke with no prospects and getting really tired of the starving artist stereotype. I found an exhibition opportunity close by without entry fees that would afford the possibility of  my work being seen by many people who probably didn’t know me or my work. I jumped at the chance, hoping that at least new eyes would see my work and at most, that I’d make a sale.

Instead, I saw my work in a new light. And that’s made all the difference in how I approach my paintings.

That exhibition was held in conjunction with the Eucharistic Congress for the Catholic diocese of San Bernardino-Riverside, CA. It was titled “Christ for the World” and was held in the Ontario Convention Center. While not an especially great venue for exhibiting art, it did give me a chance to really see what my work looked like – especially as an expression of faith. I’ve always been attracted to matters of the spirit, but before this exhibition I’d never considered my artwork and spiritual content together. As I sat there in the lobby of the convention center and looked at one of my paintings in particular, I noticed the beautiful light I was always attracted to … and suddenly it was more than I dreamed, and it was also less than what I could say. Although I went home with all my inventory, I knew I would not be the same person who created those pieces. I was now on a slightly different path, one I’d not noticed before.

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Christmases Past

Christmas Past Lg

copyright Anita L. Rodriguez, Christmas Past, watercolor, 12×16 inches

I remember as a child looking at the lit decorated Christmas tree in our living room when everyone else found something else to do. I loved gazing upon the beautiful tree, especially these 2 ornaments. I’d dream, wish, pray for the new year soon to arrive.

Fast forward to my college years. I was still living with my parents and my mother decided we needed new ornaments. She asked me if I wanted any of the old ones and I said I wanted the shiny green and the red one. I then went off and forgot about them, Mom got new stuff and I figured she threw the old ones out. I simply decided that they were gone.

Not long afterward, I went to the garage to my father’s work bench in search of a tool. I was stunned to find my 2 ornaments near a window, out of harm’s way. They were dusty and less colorful, but no less cheerful. Like old friends, they waited for me even though I’d forgotten them for a time. And my father – like my heavenly Father – kept my dreams for me, out of harm’s way until I should come to my senses.

I still have those 2 ornaments, carefully stored in tissue within a sturdy box…but I think they need to come out. Dreams and wishes can’t stay hidden.